Kisses Kindling: Reigniting the passion
By JARRETTE FELLOWS JR.
Kisses Kindling, the new romantic anthology has a mission: To restore the passion in marriages gone cold. Maintaining a fiery romance is never happenstance. Two people in love must give and take to tend the flame and keep the connection alive, always nurturing, always loving.
Kisses Kindling is not a clinical book from the perspective of a psychologist or a marriage counselor, but rather an anthology—a collection of romantic wit penned from a male perspective for men, who, over time, have become stale and inattentive in the relationships, having taken the union for granted.
These men have allowed the passion to wither— the fire to die. They have forgotten (or perhaps never knew) that one has to stoke and tend a wood fire to keep it burning. Kisses Kindling provides this encouragement to men, the head of the house- hold, a king in the marriage who must tend to his queen to arouse her instincts. God knew what He was doing when he created the man and the woman with natural instincts one for the other. But something has gone terribly awry today. The
institution is failing. This was the impetus for Kisses Kindling, a book of bliss and lovingness stylized in good taste for a married couple to share, offering a very creative nuance to persuade insensitive men to rediscover the passion that burned hot in the beginning.
Mission of Love
Kisses Kindling proffers a male perspective targeting women that long for more from their relationships. It originates from a collection of romantic prose written over time, personal experience from both a failed and successful marriage, and imagination. He provides materials designed to strengthen the bond of togetherness and devotion between two people who made a wedded vow to remain with one another forever. Love can last forever.
It is a non-clinical marriage-bonding book inspired, in part by the increasing divorce rate in the US and globally. Divorces are spiraling at 39 percent in America because unions are starving for intimacy and passion. The romance is missing.
Kisses Kindling is given as healing balm for troubled marriages not from a psychological counseling perspective. It is fun, poetic, spicy, and romantic. The anthology encourages the man to tend and stoke the fire for the passion, which has usually diminished by the time a couple realizes they are in trouble.
The potent formula offered in this book is good for any relationship and should bear new life for any couple of maturity seeking to mend.
Marriage, Intimacy and the Church
Kisses Kindling also is encouraged for the “church,” a place often void of topics on sex and intimacy. Pastors avoid this in their sermons for good reason. It is the wrong place for such, as children are usually in attendance, and pastors generally are not qualified to broach issues of eros love—they are not marriage counselors.
But Christian marriages also need love, romance, and passion to survive. Because couples may be church-goers, doesn't mean God is in the midst. Kisses Kindling is not penned like a Bible Study, but along with the Bible, the book is suitable as a tool for Christian Adult Marriage Retreats.
Christian couples should not be ashamed to share eroticism n the company of others. After all, they are adults and God says in His Word, in a Christian marriage, the bed is undefiled. Kisses Kindling is written tastefully, but there will likely be some in more conservative church circles that may find the prose in the book discomforting in a public arena. But it is exactly what they need if the marriage is foundering, to reignite the love that burned hot during courtship.
Many couples that recited their wedding vows in a church believe that God will keep them together. However, God gave a man and a woman a will. Therefore, whether love remains cohesive in the union or not, is up to them. Attending church is not enough because a couple must return home, often to environment devoid of passion—cold as the winter’s frost.
What God has brought together should not be frigid. It should be alive with tingling heat.
But where couples comprising the Silent Generation—the generation generally defined as people born from 1928 to 1945—remained together for 70-80 years out of tradition. The Silent Generation endured cold relationships devoid of passion and love. But they were determined to remain together even if though love and intimacy had long withered.
Couples in the US today are opting for divorce—notably baby boomers, faster than the ink of the marriage certificate can dry.
But Christian marriages need love to survive, too. And couples, the men in particular must re-learn how to romance their wives. Something in them must be rekindled. Love and romance by Christians is not something to shun or be embarrassed about. Everybody needs love, Christian married couples included. They should know there is no condemnation between them, as the bed is undefiled. Hebrews 13:4: “Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.”
Kisses Kindling is critical because the divorce rate among Christians is mounting steadily, increasing the overall national US divorce rate of 39 percent, according to recent studies. The antithesis of God is eroding the church with divorce. The church is comprised of families. Breaking up families with divorce, destroys the congregation. I have seen it personally. The church I attended for more than 25 years, suffered 15 divorces in that time largely due to a lack of counseling about issues like intimacy— conversations that would never occur from the pulpit.
Kisses Kindling by Jarrette Fellows Jr., is available at Amazon.com, Barnes & Noble, Alibris.com, Google Books, Dymocks, and www,archwaypublishing.com